Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
