sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
We just shotgunned beers for America
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
