between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
