is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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