Sponge bath it is.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
