I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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