OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
