Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm gonna have a badass scar
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
