let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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