My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
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