I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
