Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
vagina is talking i cant
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
We had to coat check the pizza.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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