Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Randomize
