Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
