i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
