I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
