But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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