it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
