Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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