lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
