It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
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