Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
