I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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