I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
