so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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