we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
