is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
