Cold hands, warm shart.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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