i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
