She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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