Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
