No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize