i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize