hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
