i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
