Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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