I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
