you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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