Whatcha textin bout Willis?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
