I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
