the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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