No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
