Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Edward fifth and chaser hands
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
