...so i touched it.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
