the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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