As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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