my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
