honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
