Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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