I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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